Spiritual Growth

How to Pray When You Struggle With Obedience: Following God When It’s Hard

7 min read

You know. You’ve known for a while. That conversation you need to have. That habit you need to quit. That relationship you need to end—or the one you need to repair. That step of faith that terrifies you. God has been nudging, and you’ve been stalling. Not because you don’t believe Him. But because obedience costs something, and you’re not sure you’re ready to pay.

In This Article
  1. 1.Why Obedience Feels So Hard
  2. 2.Praying Through Resistance
  3. 3.The Gethsemane Pattern
  4. 4.What Obedience Produces
  5. 5.Frequently Asked Questions

Struggling with obedience doesn’t make you a bad Christian. It makes you an honest one. Even Jesus, in the Garden of Gethsemane, asked if the cup could pass. The struggle is not the sin. Staying in the struggle permanently—choosing comfort over calling indefinitely—that’s where disobedience takes root. And the antidote isn’t willpower. It’s prayer.

Why Obedience Feels So Hard

Obedience is hard because it requires trust in something you can’t see over something you can. God says, “Go,” and you can see every reason to stay. He says, “Forgive,” and you can feel every reason not to. He says, “Wait,” and every instinct screams to move. Obedience is not the absence of resistance. It’s choosing God’s wisdom over your own in the face of that resistance.

If you love me, keep my commands.

John 14:15 (NIV)

Jesus didn’t say, “If you understand me perfectly, obey.” He said, “If you love me.” Obedience flows from relationship, not comprehension. You don’t need to understand every reason behind God’s instructions. You just need to trust the One who gave them. Love is the motivation. Trust is the mechanism. And prayer is the fuel.

Praying Through Resistance

When you know what God is asking and your soul is dragging its feet, don’t pretend the resistance isn’t there. Name it. Bring it to God. He’s not surprised by your reluctance. He’s waiting for your honesty.

  • When you’re afraid: “God, I’m scared of what obedience will cost me. Give me courage I don’t have.”
  • When you’re angry: “Lord, I don’t want to do this. I’m frustrated that You’re asking. But I trust You more than I trust my anger.”
  • When you’re confused: “Father, I don’t understand why. But I choose to obey before I understand.”
  • When you’re comfortable: “God, I don’t want to leave this comfort zone. But I want Your best more than my easy.”

The Gethsemane Pattern

In Gethsemane, Jesus showed us what honest obedience looks like. He didn’t skip to “Your will be done.” He started with “Take this cup from me.” He sweat drops of blood. He asked three times. The struggle was real. But so was the surrender. And the surrender changed the world.

If Jesus needed to wrestle before He obeyed, you will too. Don’t be ashamed of the wrestling. Be ashamed only if you stop wrestling and walk away. The goal isn’t instant compliance. It’s eventual surrender. And surrender that comes after a fight is often stronger than surrender that comes easily.

What Obedience Produces

Obedience rarely feels good in the moment. But it always produces fruit over time. Abraham’s obedience on the mountain produced a nation. Moses’ obedience at the sea produced deliverance. Mary’s obedience in Nazareth produced a Savior. Your obedience—whatever God is asking today—will produce something you can’t yet imagine. Trust the harvest, even when the planting hurts.

Surrender Prayer: Letting Go and Letting God

When you’re ready to stop fighting and start trusting, these prayers will guide you.

Challenge: Write down the one thing you believe God is currently asking you to do. Don’t edit it. Don’t explain it away. Just name it. Then pray over it for five minutes. Ask God for one small step of obedience you can take today—not the whole thing, just the first step. Then take it.

Frequently Asked Questions

How do I know if it’s really God asking or just my own guilt?
God’s promptings align with Scripture, produce peace even when they’re hard, and persist over time. Guilt-driven impulses tend to be frantic, shame-based, and disconnected from Scripture. God’s voice says, “I love you—now follow me.” Guilt says, “You’re terrible—do better.” If the prompting draws you toward God, it’s probably from God. If it drives you away from Him in shame, it’s not.
What if I obey and things get worse?
They might—at least temporarily. Obedience doesn’t guarantee immediate comfort. Moses obeyed and Pharaoh made things harder before they got better. But short-term difficulty after obedience is not a sign that you heard God wrong. It’s often confirmation that you heard Him right. The enemy pushes back hardest when you’re moving in the right direction. Keep going.
Can I obey God and still have doubts?
Absolutely. Obedience doesn’t require certainty. It requires willingness. Gideon obeyed with a fleece in his hand. Thomas followed despite his doubts. You can step forward while still having questions. In fact, obedience in the presence of doubt is one of the purest forms of faith—because it means you’re trusting God more than you’re trusting your own understanding.

Share This Article

Pray Through the Resistance

Let AbidePray create a personalized, Scripture-grounded prayer for exactly what you’re facing right now.

Continue Reading